Behold I am with you and I will keep you wherever you go, and I will bring you back to this land; for I will not leave you until I have done what I have promised. Genesis 28:15
I remember the first time I got this scripture, I was running into my home after work and I was crying hysterically. My then fiance had left me and called off everything two months before we were to be married. I ran immediately and grabbed my bible and this was what the Lord gave me. Through my tears, I could barely see, and I remember asking God, “what do you mean that you are going to do what you promised”? What just happened and what you promised me are two different things. Through a long story made short, I had met my fiance in 2004 and we broke up and afterwards the Lord began to speak to me phophetically that He was raising it from the dead, that it was not over, and correlated our story to Lazarus. He also said that He was moving him to Dallas. Four years later, God brought to pass everything that He had said. We began moving forward believing that God divinely knitted us together as life partners. We began preparing for a wedding and I have a half written book called the Lazarus Effect. Now he is gone. It is nearly one year since and the past year has been one of life transforming for me. I have cried a bucket full of tears and at one time was even mad at God to the point that I told Him that I would not consult Him for anything in my life and I even put up my bible for a brief time. Thank goodness that God was merciful to my pain, His intent was to use my breaking to eventually draw closer to Him. As I began to draw closer to Him, I grew to find who I was in Him and was healed of many childhood wounds. The past year has been one of hurt, anger and confusion which has turned into trust, contentment and peace. I often refer to my breaking as a meat tenderizer because I have a deeper compassion that I have never had and I believe the things that break God’s heart now break mine! For once, I have no idea what God has planned for me, if He chooses to raise Lazarus again and He finishes the story OR if He has chosen someone else for me, I am totally alright with either because I know that He has a good plan for me. I don’t know if you are broken or are confused and mad at God. Please take comfort that God is with you and He will not leave you. You may not know what God has promised you, but know this one thing, He loves you! All things are possible for those who believe and by making a decision in your confusion to trust Him, He will make your crooked path straight, illuminate what is dark so you can see, reverse what is impossible to possible and restore back joy where there was once pain! I love you and God bless you !