Tag Archives: dating

God looks at the Heart

Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers [do not make mismated alliances with them or come under a different yoke with them, inconsistent with your faith]. For what partnership have right living and right standing with God with iniquity and lawlessness? Or how can light have fellowship with darkness?     2 Corinthians 6:14

 I went to a bible study last night that I have been attending since 2004. I was so glad that I went because it had been at least 2 years since I had attended. The leader so inspired me and I was grateful to be there because I felt the Holy Spirit really reminding me of the woman of faith that I used to be. I really miss her and want so bad to be her again. My faith used to be so strong that I was moved very little by my cirumstances and if I was hit with something negative, I would respond as Jesus and reply with a ‘it is written’ response. My faith has certainly been diluted and I waiver a lot more now. What has happened? In 2006 I lost a job that I loved, we had gotten notice that our doors were closing and I was devastated. God is so awesome and he opened a door for me before this one closed. I was getting used to being in my new job and it was not long that I began to notice a really cute guy on my team. One day our team went out to lunch and he sat next to me and the rest is history. I began dating him and I noticed right away obvious red flags, but I just ignored them……I wanted to date him. My new interest was Catholic and believed in God, but we certainly did not share the same beliefs. I noticed that as I continued to date him that I gradually quit going to church and I seldom spent time alone reading my bible or worshipping God in quiet time. I found myself gradually easing more into a compromised lifestyle and I would let him talk me into doing things that I did not want to do, but at the same time I wanted to please him. I remember on a rare occassion I got into God’s word and this is what I received:

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature, because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

 I knew exactly what God was telling me, he has rejected the person that I had chosen for myself, but later I would learn more about what God was trying to tell me. I was getting the message, but I was refusing to obey. I began to notice that the times that I would go to church that I was losing my sensitivity to the Lord, when worship music began to play, I could not even muster a tear…….my heart had hardened and my life was in a very dangerous place spiritually. I would never admit it, but I was very unhappy and I missed God and I felt very dry and empty, but I did not want to stop rebelling. By this point in my relationship a lot has happened and too much detail to even share, but the second part of the scripture in 1 Samuel was about to be revealed. All this time I had been focusing on an outward appearance instead of looking at the most important thing which is the heart. God revealed something to me that devastated me about the person I was in relationship with. I had up to this point spent nearly a year and a half with the person and we lived approximately 2 miles apart. How could he be living a double life!!!??? How did I not know????? This was more than just someone cheating, all at once I recalled so many shows I had watched and listened to someone describe that the person that they were married to was not that at all — I was shocked, but realized, how easy it is to be deceived!! This was God’s son and He loves him very much, but God knew his heart, he knew what he was doing behind my back and he knew what he was capable of. God had probably given me that scripture a dozen times and every time I just ignored him and pursued my will and now I am devastated, shocked and deceived. I broke up with this person and he stalked me and I feared for my safety for another 2 years!! I had to go through another devastating loss before I was able to get my hard heart broken enough so that it would be so tenderized for the things of God which now I am so grateful for. I don’t ever want my heart to harden towards God or the things of God. I am gradually growing back into that woman I once was, because I had separated myself from God and from His word and teachings that were my armour. You know I have friends who are in marriages, they are not going through what I went through, however, they are unequally yoked and it does present a lot of problems. I have heard my friends say that they are lonely because their husband does not share the excitement that they share. Their husbands try to keep them from tithing and they don’t enjoy going to church or even serving and chalk everything up to coincidence rather than divine appointments. When God put the scripture in the bible about being unequally yoked, he did it because he cares for us and knows the issues and struggles a couple will suffer for being unequally yoked……but like my situation, God wanted to reveal to me that he also knows a person’s heart and that is the first place he looks, rather than appearance, etc. Knowing that God knows everything, I want Him to choose my partner for life, rather than me choose because I overlook what is most important and what can save me a lifetime of hurt. I hope you were blessed by this and seek God about your friends as well as who you date and even marry.

Leave a comment

Posted by on June 4, 2012 in Uncategorized


Tags: ,