Live of a life of what matters most

So Abram said to Lot, “Please let there be no strife between you and me, nor between my herdsmen and your herdsmen, for we are brothers. Genesis 13:8

Conflict is inevitable. I have gotten a great revelation about relationships and they were one of the first few things that God initially created. Relationships serve many purposes and without them life would be more difficult. God created the first relationship for procreation. The second thing God did was show us a picture of his covenant with us through Abraham. He shows us the power of agreement with two or more or how assignments are birthed through our alignments. I have learned that there is such a fight for our relationships. If the enemy can divide us, he is ultimately attacking the purpose that two or more people would have as a result of their alignment. Its where the word division comes from – die vision.

Even though I have this revelation about a fight for our relationships, it has not been enough for me to always deal best when I am confronted with conflict, offense, hurt or anger.

It’s unfortunate that it has taken recent trauma in my life to really put it all in it’s proper perspective. My parents were diagnosed with cancer last September within weeks apart. Praise God they were both cancer free by December. We are grateful for the amazing team that my mother had and because of their wisdom they have been very proactive with my mom. They recently did some precautionary tests on her and found more cancer. We are in shock because we thought that her cancer was caught early and she was cancer free. It’s been scary to see how quickly they have moved since last Monday. She has already had a biopsy and will start chemotherapy next week. They do not want to open her up for the fear of the cancer spreading. They are using words like treatable but not curable! It’s the very thought of losing a loved one that has given me such a great new outlook. We are not guaranteed tomorrow, so don’t let a day go by without living it to the fullest. Also, I am beginning to put my life issues into what matters most and what does not matter categories.

When I am tempted to get upset or offended, I just remember that at the end of the day that really does not matter to get into strife or offense with anyone. Because of my current situation I have decided to live a life that most matters and to give everyone I am in relationship the best of me. I am done with being afraid that someone is going to leave, waiting for someone else to be the bigger person and apologize, putting up walls to protect myself and being vulnerable. I want to have NO regrets. The more that I let all this go, I have peace that surpasses all my understanding, I have a greater capacity for God’s power in my life and I am blessed.

In the passage of Genesis, God told Abram to leave his family and his country and go to a place where God would show him. He took Lot with him anyway. God was taking Abram to the promised land and along the way he and Lot got into conflict. He told Lot that he did not want to be in conflict with him or his herdsmen. He gave Lot a choice in the division of the land so they could be separated. Lot of course took the best part of the land. The thing is God did not promise anything to Lot. What he was part of was all because of Abram. Even though Lot took the best part out of entitlement, Abram still refused to be in conflict with him.

God honored Abram because he sacrificed to stay out of conflict. We pick up in verse 14 and look at what God did. The LORD said to Abram, after Lot had separated from him, “Now lift up your eyes and look from the place where you are, northward and southward and eastward and westward; for all the land which you see, I will give it to you and to your descendants forever!

God always has a blessing for us. It looked as if he got the least of God’s promise. Even when it looks as if you have lost everything God is always working behind the scenes and can give you more than you can ever imagine.

Decided today to seize each day and live on purpose with what really matters most and let go of what does not matter!!!

 

Resolution

“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will be called children of God.” (Matthew 5:9 NIV)

When you are in conflict, concentrate on reconciliation rather than resolution. There’s a big difference: Reconciliation means to re-establish the relationship, but resolution means to resolve every issue by coming to agreement on everything.

That’s simply not going to happen. I don’t care if you both love the Lord or are deeply in love with each other; there are some things you’ll never agree on, because God has wired each of us differently.

But you can disagree without being disagreeable — that’s called wisdom. The Bible says in James 3, “Wisdom is peace loving and courteous. It allows discussion, and it is willing to yield to others.”

The Bible says it’s wise to compromise. You can have unity without uniformity. You can walk hand-in-hand without seeing eye-to-eye. You can have reconciliation without resolution of every issue.

When we focus on the relationship, the issues often become insignificant. This is my challenge to you: In a world filled with conflict, war, prejudice, violence, partisanship, and broken relationships, commit to becoming an agent of reconciliation.

It is no accident that the first letter of P.E.A.C.E represents God’s goal for us to be peacemakers. It’s always more rewarding to resolve the conflict than to dissolve the relationship.

My pastor coins a phrase of giving up your right to be right, which is simply teaching us to position ourselves as the peacemaker. At the end of the day what does it matter if you are right or wrong. Lately, I just say to God, ‘you know the truth and if you want to reveal the truth, then that is totally up to you’ and I can let go of it. Since having ill parents it has put me in a place of asking myself what really matters most at the end of the day. I am grateful the experience to help me put things in perspective.